Recently, I delivered a national webinar Speak Success: 7 Talking Tips to Achieve the Goal. Keep reading for the Top 3 Talking Tips.
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Barbara Kay Tweet
#1 Top Tip to Avoid Confusion & Mistakes
Communication confusion wastes time and creates huge aggravation. Yet, it happens frequently. The clinical psychology technique of Active Listening gets everyone on the same page. Active Listening is a simple two-step process:
1. Listen with intention to both the meaning and the tone of the message.
2. Confirm you “got it” by summarizing & checking for understanding.
That’s it! Simple! 30 seconds of checking is all it takes. Try it, works like a charm!
#2 Top Tip to Avoid Aggravation
Get your “but” Out!
The problem with “but”:
- Most often “but” is used to make an excuse:
“I’m sorry I was so abrupt this morning, but you were late to our meeting.”
- “But” erases everything immediately preceding the “but”. Your listener only hears:
“You were late to our meeting.”
- It deflects responsibility for the abrupt tone. The implied message is:
“My abrupt tone was your fault because you were late and made me abrupt”
Avoid aggravating people: Keep your “but” Out!
#3 Top Tip to Avoid Conflict
Use the power of “Yes…..and”
When we disagree, we often say “but” then present our position. This escalates disagreement and pushes people farther apart. Instead, use the powerful “Yes….And” technique:
1. Find the one thing you can agree with and agree completely with conviction.
2. Only after agreeing totally, with at least one thing, add your point of view with a connector: “and”, “also”, “you may not be aware that….”.
3. After you connect by agreeing and share your view, move to problem-solving together. The talking tip of Powerful Questions is a great start.
For Powerful Questions and all 7 Talking Tips, download your free tools.
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For the “how-to” listen to: Speak Success: 7 Talking Tips to Achieve the Goal (30 min. mp4)
Keep the 7 tips handy, download the PDF slides
Contact me to discuss your situation in more detail. Let’s achieve your success!